In 2018, I signed up to coaching sessions with Letecia Rose from Skill Market. One of her first pieces of coaching homework was to measure your life (on a scale from 1-10) in the following aspects:
Friends & Family
Fun & Recreation
Money, Fun & Recreation, and Friends & Family needed to be addressed the most. So what was going awry that I felt I was underperforming so much in these aspects of my life? Let’s see:
Not many people will admit their income in such a public space, but I want to be transparent.
See, in Canada, to be considered as a low-income earner, you must be earning less than $23,000 as a single person. I earned a little bit less than the $23k checkpoint last year. But also, I was officially a full-time freelancer, securing gigs, and transitioning into a new industry - far far away from the not-for-profit sector. With my low income, I managed to afford rent, travel to South America and USA, contributing to my investment accounts, and still pay my bills. Sure, it was a struggle, sometimes I spent money unwisely, and I often had breakdowns about money, but I also know I can survive off of $15k, so when I make more it means I can thrive.
Side note: Since September 2018 until January 2019, I managed to invest $400+ in my Wealthsimple account because they made investing ridiculously easy. I started with and automatic withdrawal of $25/month and when I occassional lump sums of money, I added them to my account. Get your free account today.
Fun & Recreation.
The moment I wrote “Fun & Recreation”, I felt the urge to look at my calendar to see what I scheduled in 2018 that was deemed “fun”. When doing the Wheel of Life activity, I thought about fun as paid group outings such as amusement park visits, bowling, pool hall hangouts, board game night, etc.
As I reflect on this further, fun looks like reading in a coffee shop and sharing what I learn on IG or in book summaries, vacations, watching greys Anatomy while cooking, wine tours, hiking with my loved ones, dancing to music when I wake up, and cuddle puddles.
When rating my level of fun, I didn’t even consider the ways I have fun - they are more relaxing and calm.
Related Article: Re-Think Your Life
Friends & Family.
There is an activity in the book Upgrade by Rana Florida where she invites you to rate the people in your life:
-1 if they take more time/energy/resources/emotional space/effort than what you want
0 if they are just there, don’t add or remove value - they could possibly be a filler friend
+1 if they inspire/motivate/challenge/love/care/nourish/fulfill you in the ways you need
If you rated any of your personal friends -1 or 0, maybe it means it’s time to start adjusting whom you spend your time with? I went a step further and considered the content I was consuming. I rated the influencers I followed on IG, youtube videos I watched, and TW content I saw daily. I must admit, the people I was following on social media had significantly more +1s than my circle of family and friends. Thus, I started working on making more friends, connecting less with people who were -1s and 0s, and I continue to do so as the years progress.
Also, I thought about if I’m a -1, 0, or +1 in my friends’ lives. I saw who I could turn to to complain, gain some loving care, and leave without reciprocating - take, take, take was all I did in those instances. So I got my act together and started giving and reciprocating.
Now that we are a few months beyond November 2018, my Wheel of Life looks very different.
Thinking about your life in this moment, how would you rate your life?
P.S. I had to search for the title of the chart above, it’s called a “Pie Radar Chart”.